I look at that picture and the way the leaves are scattered around. Messy and chaotic. It’s not just chucks and leaves. If the camera had panned up to my face you would have felt the sadness. Palpable through my tired brown eyes. My arms dangling by my sides. My black heart completely broken. My cheeks marked by tears. I stood there alone driven by different questions. I had abandoned my gut and that is what led me there. I never thought that it could heal. I had to feel that to get to today. Now if you were to pan up the hope has swept back in illuminating the green sparkle in my eyes. My one hand is intertwined with his. By black heart beaming. My cheeks flushed with optimism. Trusting my gut every step of the way.